Just like “Sharknado,” Donald Trump rains down on the GOP in a hurricane of destruction and devastation.
“Hello, Grand Ole Party. I am your worst nightmare,” yells the Donald, sounding like Jack Nicholson in “The Shining” as he brings his reality TV ax to the GOP primaries.
Trump plays the media like a maestro romancing a Stradivarius. Heedless of the treasure he’s clutching, he makes screechy, “look-at-me, look-at-me music” never before wrenched from the instrument.
And the media’s pissed because they know he’s playing them, too. But they continue to dance to his cacophonous Strad lusting after the “ratings” and money he puts into their career coffers. Let’s see, who looks worse here–Trump or the media?
If I hear members of the media say one more time, “He’s sucked-up all the oxygen in the room,” I think I’ll stick a pencil in my eye. Then I could at least make “one-eyed Dick” jokes.
Trump has the impulse control of a sleep deprived two-year old. He’s made Chris Christie’s tough New Jersey style, resemble Little Bow Beep weeping over lost sheep. And remember, Christie’s the one who said “Politics ain’t bean bag.”
Well, politics ain’t bean bag now … it’s Russian roulette with the gun pointed at the other candidates and Trump’s finger on the trigger.
GOP heads beseech Trump to get out, saying he’s bad for the Party, which is kind of like saying botulism is bad for salmonella. Sure, he might be bad for that “Party,” but he’s great at throwing a big-assed party for the rest of us. Witness his Iowa barbecue served from silver chaffing dishes rather than takeout boxes.
“He’ll peak,” the candidates yell. Bloviating political pundits forecast is imminent demise. But week after week, Trump comes up with a list of new targets and epithets to stoke the media frenzy.
“The Apprentice” lasted for 14 seasons – 185 episodes. Don’t you think he can hold out for a measly year of primaries?
You’ve got to hand it to the Trump-meister, he’s electrified the campaign as he roasts his opponents with the regularity of a Presto Hot Dogger.
Thanks Donald! I salute you for turning the GOP primary into a pumped-up political version of the “Terminator,” all the while screaming, “I’ll be ba-a-a-ck.”
I don’t know about you, but I think I’ll take the Trump-inator at his word.