And you thought 2016 was all about Trump vs Hillary

condoms-access-deniedThe wild and wooly 2016 presidential election’s over.  The peaceful, but awkward transition of power’s begun.

Democratic Party autopsies, euphemisms for “I told you so,” are rolling out.

But the real fun of a spent election is the review of ballot issues that don’t get the nation’s attention … the state and local ones that spotlight people’s lives where the rubber meets the road.

That’s where the seriously absurd events of “Election 2016” lived.

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And surprise, surprise … guess where it’s ab-so-lute-ly the most seriously absurd!

Yep … Cal-i-Porn-i-yea and Prop 60.  The will of the people “rains” supreme … which, unless you count “Golden Rain Showers,” is the only rain they get these days.

Prop 60’s the one that requires porn-studs to wear condoms while on the production set … not just for sex scenes.

I dunno, but it seems to me there’s a physiological problem with this “prop.”

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Scene 1 Take 1:

Visualize …

Porn-stud tooling in his Porsche 911 Turbo Cabriolet headed to his next big boff.  Hair sliding through the California breeze, one hand draped over the wheel, “California Dreamin’” blasting through the sound system.

Zipped tightly in his genes lies his “street-cred-man-sized-male-member” … tucked inside a day glow California Trump-Orange condom.

But … you have to take the producer’s word for it, ‘cause you can’t see it!

And the real killer in Prop 60 is a clause that opens the door for any state resident to “enforce this law.”

Wow … any resident?  You don’t even have to have a ticket stub proving you actually saw the F**k Film?  It’s a “Let’s-Go-to-Court-Free-Card?”  Talk about a new income stream for salivating lawyers.

Well … the bad news for lawyers is the good news for the porn industry.

Prop 60 was defeated at the ballot box … “California Dreamin’” still “rains” supreme.

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Can those wild and crazy Left-coasters top Prop 60?  You betcha!

But only because they voted in a dead guy over a live gal in a local bid for City Treasurer of Oceanside City.  And the folks who voted for him knew he was dead!

That’s the supreme electoral insult!

“Ms. Scott, how’d you do in your bid to become City Treasurer?

“You lost?  You lost to a dead guy?  By six points?”

“Even though Gary passed away, he is still better qualified than she is,” said current Councilman, Jerry Kern.

Damn, man … that’s what I call a really bad loss.

Just sayin’ …

4 thoughts on “And you thought 2016 was all about Trump vs Hillary

  1. As a card-carrying, censorship-loving, gun-toting religious zealot – I’ll pause here for a moment while the laughter dies down – let me say this about that:
    U-B-2-FUNNY, Ricky Ricardo!

    Still, I’m not sure which would be worse: Losing an election to a dead guy or losing an errection to the thought of porn audiences everywhere spotting my obvious short-comings “tucked inside a day glow California Trump-Orange condom.”

    • hey, TL … thanks for the compliment … You knew I had to get a T-Rump reference in there somewhere. I did lose one election … middle school class VP … total humiliation when I lost to a “gurl.” Fortunately, I always seem to find where I’ve temporarily misplaced my erection(s) …

      Until next week … I’m counting on my little world to continue being seriously absurd.

  2. WHERE do you find this stuff? Like Tom, I am a card-carrying porno-hater and wish they’d all get parts in “snuff-em-out” films. Whoever wrote the legislation must not know much about men, hunh?
    As for voting in someone dead, there are a lot of folks, given the option, who perhaps would have chosen that during the federal election this time. Now, who do you think, dead, they would have chosen? Somethin’ to getcha thinkin’ I bet!

    • Hey, PMartha … thanks for reading and for all your support …

      EZ one … best dead president for this past election is “Honest Abe.” Though by today’s standards, who know just how honest he really was. I think anyone will have a tuff time facing down today’s social media onslaught.

      Porno never made sense to me … the films are having a tuff time as are the magazines, thanks to the internet … I liked the fact that any resident could sue … talk about the wild west of legaldom.

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