Trump Receives long awaited “Take Home Exam”

Rudy Giuliani’s joined the “Prison-Orange-Is-The-New-Trump-Orange” … so we gotta keep Trump outta jail crack legal team.

As he prepares for a first date with “I-Don’t-Kiss-And-Tell” Bob Mueller … Rudy’s new organization, “InfoLeaks,” replaces WikiLeaks as the primary source to help formulate ‘45’s legal strategy.

True to Rudy’s role as “The Grand Leaker,” a study guide of possible questions for Trump’s exam date made it into the news this past week.

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Even receiving the questions in advance, Vegas odds on Trump’s success haven’t budged … 50-1 that ‘45 will not bother to prepare for this test … 100-1 that he’ll “Fake it” and fail miserably.

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Seriously Absurd’s go-to investigative team perused the complete list of proposed questions and quite frankly … we’re terribly disappointed.

So, it’s time to step up to the swamp trough and present our own questions …   questions we’re all dying to have answered.

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President Trump …

Free Association:  What in God’s name makes you think you’re going to escape this mess and remain the President of the United States?  We’re just curious …

Twitter Spelling Bee:  What is the difference between “a Special Council and a Special Counsel” … “Roll and role” … “Coverage and covfefe” …  “Unpresidented and unprecedented” … “Lightweight choker and leightweight chocker?”

Relationship with Vlad:  Can you reveal when and where you and Vlad had sex with each other, and whether Attorney Michael Cohen drew up the NDA for Vlad?

Medical Records:  Is Admiral/Doctor Ronnie “Soon-to-be-Unemployable” Jackson eligible for payoffs for his efforts to expunge any references to STD’s or syphilis in your medical records stolen from Dr. Harold “I-am-not-a-Stoner” Bornstein’s office?

More Sex:  Is it true that in a 2017 Cabinet meeting, you asked Steve Bannon, as proclaimed by Anthony Scaramucci, to demonstrate how he could “perform unnatural sex acts on himself?”  Perhaps these photos provided by Stephen Miller might help.

Marital Relations:  Why does Melania slap your hand away when you reach for hers’ in public?

Middle East Multiple Choice:  How many days will it take for the US military to completely destroy Iran now that you’re sure they’ve violated the terrible, deplorable and useless Iran Treaty … (A) 6 days … (B) 0 days – they’ll surrender before the war starts … (C) Forever – Once started, it will never end … (D) All of the above which gives me total latitude to do as I please.

Attorneys:  How sorry are you that you did not hire Michael Avenatti before Stormy Daniels did?

Just sayin’ …

4 thoughts on “Trump Receives long awaited “Take Home Exam”

  1. How about if Mueller just gets Mr. MAGA’s testimony via twitter, followed by a one-on-one with NBC’s Lester Holt, concluding with a phone-in to Sean Insanity w/Mueller as the in-studio guest?

    The final OSC report can be delivered on “Fox and Friends” …

    • Hi Mike … Guess what? You win … what a masterful scenario … I love it … Thanks for reading and commenting!

  2. Is it just a fig newton of my amalgamation or are you implying – in an ever-so-subtle way – that all is not entirely well at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue?

    • Hi TL … Did I imply it or say it outright? Whichever … i think it’s safe to say that “all is not well at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue” … Thanks for reading and commenting.

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