Andy & I … An Oval Office Conversation

Date … any day President Trump’s in the White House … therefore, not a weekend or Friday afternoon.

Time … 3 AM.

Scene … Oval Office … Trump’s pacing in front of the Presidential Portrait of “Ole#7,” Andrew Jackson … Trump’s clutching his Presidential Blackberry …Jackson’s portraited eyes follow Trump.


PrezT:  I dunno, Andy.  Today was tough.

PrezJ:   I told ya it wasn’t gonna be a bed a roses!  But bootin’ the head of the FBI …  that’s just bone headed!

What were ya thinking’?  Oh … never mind.

PrezT:  Yeh … I hear ya.  I thought I had a good idea when I bragged about what a great problem solver you were … how you’d fix all that Civil War stuff.

But some a-hole reporter said you died before the war.  One little slipup.  I’m really tired of all this … “Ruler of the Free World,” my ass.

PrezJ:  I’m not sure, but I think that’s “Leader,” not “Ruler.  As in “Leader of the Free World.”

PrezT:  I knew that.  I got an idea … you oughta come down to my place in Florida.  You’ll love what’s happened to it since you were there last.

‘Cept you couldn’t whip those Indians, the what’s-their-names … and now they block me every time I wanna build a casino.

PrezJ:  Ya mean there’re still Seminoles running around?  And, by the way, moron … every fifth grader knows I died 16 years before the Civil War.

PrezT:  I hadda get rid of Comey.  He wouldn’t swear allegiance to me.  He started hogging the limelight.

PrezJ:  Well that’s a “yuuge and bigly” problem.

Hey butter-butt … at least I didn’t compare my inauguration crowd with #6 … that midget, JQ Adams.  Though reporters misrepresented that bash we had at the White House after my inauguration.

Whoowee … that was my kinda parteee!

PrezT:  Yeah … reporters screw me on crowd size all the time.  I gotta shut ‘em up on Hillary’s three million votes.  Voter fraud … that oughta do it.

Hey … did ya ever play golf?

I love golf.  Did I tell you I always win at golf?  I’ll take ya down on Air Force One.

PrezJ:  I’d rather ride horses.  That’s what real men do.  What’s an Air Force One?


Sad … a spoiled brat President talking to a portrait.  Gimme me a break.

Or even better … gimme a real President.

Just sayin’ …

2 thoughts on “Andy & I … An Oval Office Conversation

  1. Portraits and presidents, eh? Well, at least in your version, president number 45 is a tad more civil to Old Hickory than he is to everyone else in his usual 3 a.m. nocturnal emissions…AKA…tweets.
    (You remember the word “civil.” It means courteous and polite. Like the thoughtful way General Sherman provided warmth to the citizens of Atlanta by burning the town to the ground. That allowed Scarlett, Rhett, Melanie and little Beau Wilkes to be nice and toasty warm on their jaunty little buggy ride out to Tara.) Sorta.
    Still, the portrait thing still bothers me.
    For some reason the name “Dorian Gray” keeps popping into my head along with visions of what #45’s likeness would look like now and – worse – what it will look like in the next few years.

    • Hey TL … Welcome back and thanks for commenting.

      Take a look at the Inauguration photos and the 4-8 years later photos and you’ll get an idea about what’s gonna happen to Trump. You’re starting with problems from hair, surgery, weight and posture to begin with … Think in terms of a tall Quazimododo with my apologies to Quaz.

      My mother always referred to “The War’ as that “time of Northern aggression.” She kept a stash of Confederate money interspersed between the pages of the family bible … she never gave up … Scarlett was her true heroine.

      Thanks for all your support …

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