What do Super Bowl LIV & V-Day have in common? (More than you might think, Grasshopper)

V-Day’s come and gone … behind it a wake of poorly-expressed-proclamations-of-undying-love … half-eaten-past-code-date-chocolates … deflated balloons … and discarded-super-market-flowers … flown-in-from-god-knows-where.

For many, this V-Day exchange is a “sexual quid-pro-quo” … which loosely means an “exchange of favors” … “You get this and I get laid!”

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Also come-and-gone … Super Bowl LIV.

That would be “54” for those who had trouble with “quid-pro-quo” … and you thought Latin was a “dead language!”

Both of these “non-holiday-holidays” have one thing in common … at least in the eyes of some in our population.

That common bond?  A “mega-sex” event … with a special thanks to the last Super Bowl halftime “show-all!”

That Nanosecond glimpse of the uncovered Janet Jackson boob … Super Bowl XXXVIII (38 for Latin illiterates) … caused weeks of Christian teeth gnashing … and a direct “perp-walk-to-Hell” … for Janet.

Flash forward 16 years (XXXVIII + XVI = LIV) … many of the fine-Fundamentalist-Evangelical ladies and gentlemen who … instead of beating a path to bathrooms for a halftime pee … tuned into the halftime J. Lo and Shakira extravaganza.

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No matter their show was hyped relentlessly for weeks ahead of the big game.

No matter the music, costumes, staging, dancing … and what you called “soft porn” … were splashed on screens in your homes on endless pre-broadcast promotional streams.

These two leading female Latina entertainers crashed the alleged “virginal sanctity” of your living room … thus creating a major Christian backlash about “sexploitation” … of your 13 year olds.

OMG … Those two Latinas rolled on the ground … rubbed against ropes seductively … rubbed their legs together … and for God’s sake, rubbed their crotches!

By 2025 we’ll probably have orgies on stage!

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Did you forget when it was …

“OMG Martha … “Thank God the bottom of the TV screen’s blacked out … that Devil’s Spawn Elvis’s wiggling again!”

OMG Martha … “Look at those long haired British boys … they’re poisoning our minds!”

OMG Martha … “That Rapper just grabbed his crotch!”

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Your kids see T&A everywhere … at the beaches … at high school events … movies … music videos … teen beauty pageants … competitive cheer leading … gymnastics and swim meets … all the TV shows you think you chip-blocked.

There’s and entire aisle in your grocery store dedicated to sexual innuendo … they’re called greeting cards!

And now at MAGA rallies …

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Just sayin’ …

2 thoughts on “What do Super Bowl LIV & V-Day have in common? (More than you might think, Grasshopper)

  1. This got me thinking … Is there anything advertisers haven’t tried to use sex to sell? Let’s see … reusable catheters, collard greens, baby wipes, septic tanks? I’m sure I’ve missed some, but the list is short. Still there’s always a “Puritan” backlash. The Europeans think we’re crazy … They wonder why we’re fighting about sex, when we tolerate or celebrate violence of all forms. God save you if you try to take away a “Puritan’s” automatic rifles. To quote Mr. Richard … Just sayin’.

  2. Are you writing in tongues with all those capital letters? Maybe they should change the game’s name to Super Boob? Pass the nachos, please…

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